The Rotten Fruit of the Virgin Mary

Jesus is going to have a field day with this one: “You will know them by their fruits. Are grapes gathered from thorns, or figs from thistles? In the same way, every good tree bears good fruit, but the bad tree bears bad fruit, ‘Mom’. A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, nor can a bad tree bear good fruit. Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire. Thus you will know them by their fruits.”

I’m positive that Jesus will appear himself somewhere on something in the next few weeks. He simply cannot let Mary take the headlines and apparition glory for herself. Personally, I’m closely inspecting all food in my house. The only time I consume the body of Christ is at communion, thank you. Transubstantiation powers activate!

Undeterred by her son’s taunting Mary continues appearing on grilled cheese sandwiches, trees, and other inanimate objects. Today Mary has been found on a grape.

I’m not sure what Mary’s didactic purpose might be with such an appearance but seeing as the person who found the iconic grape is Baptist and the grape was rotten I’m guessing that Mary is trying to tell us that using grape juice for communion is wrong. It seems the only reasonable solution; back to wine I guess.

Holy Relic?

Becky Ginn was about to throw out some rotten grapes this week when she noticed a familiar image on one of them — the Virgin Mary.

“I turned it over, and said, ‘oh that looks like the Virgin Mary,’” she said. “It was the first thing that popped into my head.”

The whole story HERE

OK. I want everybody to get ready to put on their surprise faces at this startling revelation: she’s going to try and sell the grape on eBay. Who woulda thunk it?