Holy Week – Monday: The Cleansing of the Temple
Bad to the Bone Jesus
Riding without a helmet is a fine in many places and extremely unsafe. No matter what Jesus says a golden crown of thorns is not proper head protection. What about the kids? What will they think? Jesus doesn’t wear a helmet so I don’t need to wear a helmet. Think about the kids Jesus. The kids!
Perhaps though, this is the Jesus that went to the Temple and kicked some blessed assurance while clearing out the money lenders. With the right theme music it would make a pretty good movie scene.
The movie title: Holy Ghost Rider.
The trailer: a montage of quick cuts between Jesus driving like a bat out of heaven, turning over tables, and cracking his whip ala Indiana Jones to “Heaven’s on Fire” by Kiss. At some point everyone in the Temple stops and looks at Jesus and he says, “I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass… (dramatic pause) and I’m all out of bubblegum.”
Clearly you are thinking the exact same thing as me: “That would be just too sweet!”
it would mess up his hair — c’mon, be reasonable