Instant Karma is Going to Get You

Public Service Announcement

Apparently, if you stand in an enclosure with a grown 1000 pound bull and tease it with a red cape while stabbing it repeatedly with swords the bull may become enraged and gore you in the face.

PSA over.

I like to do my part here to keep you kids safe!

Now before you go and feel all bad for the Spanish bullfighter Julio Aparicio in the above picture, the day before this he showed his “dominance” by cutting the ears off two vanquished bulls.

And I agree that the picture is shocking BUT:

“The sickening goring happened as Aparicio was going in for the faena, a series of passes in which he uses his cape and sword before delivering the wounded animal the death blow, or estocada.”

“As Aparicio teased the angry bull with his cape to entertain the fans, it was the bull who delivered the finishing move as the experienced matador fell to his rear end.”

Read more: NYPost

Picture not enough? How about some video:

Not the best First-Aid service I’ve ever seen at a sporting event. The bull-fighter Aparicio is in the hospital, and he’s hurting, but he’s going to live.

However, the story has a sad ending. The Post reports, “It was not clear what happened to the bull.” Yeah, like we don’t know what happened. They seem to respect the animals, so I’m pretty sure it’s recuperating from its wounds somewhere. Either that, or they killed it out of revenge, even though that seems way out of character. I’ll let you decide.

I’m going to imagine a happier ending today.

The bull escapes in the confusion, and lives in the wild venerated among his own kind, and tells the story to his grandchildren, “Well, this small pink thing kept poking me and waving a cape in my face while all the other pink things yelled. Finally, I had enough and just gored it in the head and made a break for it…”

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