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Revelation Raveled: The Third Eagle is Back!

April 29, 2011

From The American Jesus

‘Deep Impact’ Was Really Biblical Prophecy

This shouldn’t come as much of a surprise.

After all it starred Morgan Freeman as the “President”, obviously a metaphor for God since he ALWAYS plays God in movies including movies in which he technically isn’t playing God. And Elijah Wood was the kid that “saved” the day. Not coincidentally Mr. Wood also played the “messianic” Frodo Baggins in Lord of the Rings who saves the world by casting the one ring into the fires of Mt. Doom.

What’s really important in all of this is: THE THIRD EAGLE IS BACK!!!

After a long hiatus the “Co-prophet of the End Times” has returned with new revelations and this time he’s armed…..with a chainsaw and wood cutting machine of some sort. Man can that guy chop some wood.

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9 Comments leave one →
  1. April 29, 2011 10:47 am

    “23, as we all know, is another way to express 666.”

  2. April 29, 2011 11:51 am

    Well, now I understand why Michael Jordan was so successful in the NBA — he was in a pact with Satan!!! Michael Jordan is the antichrist!

  3. Jake permalink
    April 30, 2011 8:44 am

    I was born on the 23rd…

  4. Headless Unicorn Guy permalink
    May 1, 2011 12:59 pm

    WTF is “Coment Elenin”?

    “23, as we all know, is another way to express 666.” — Davo

    It’s the Rule of 23! The Discordian Society is Everywhere!

  5. Grant permalink
    May 3, 2011 4:06 am

    Someone spent time to make that display board he used

    He needs a jingle to start off his program

  6. Headless Unicorn Guy permalink
    May 3, 2011 8:46 am

    “It’s Prophesied, It’s Prophesied,
    What happens when your brains are fried…”

  7. Grant permalink
    May 4, 2011 11:47 am

    3rd eagle’s jingle for this episode

  8. Joe permalink
    December 8, 2012 2:19 pm

    A very confused and delusional man :( …. And to make matter worse when someone tries to correct him ( and we all make mistakes) ……he blocks them.

    Even in doing this, his house of wobbly cards constantly comes crashing down around him with one failed prophecy after another.

    This is all about his ego

  9. Joe permalink
    December 8, 2012 2:31 pm

    I think that he honestly believes he is the third eagle. Therefore all that he says has got to be from God, and all that oppose him from satan.

    If his “prophesies don’t come true , then he makes excuses and tries to make them some how appear true.
    fact is, a true prophet has to only be wrong once to make him a false prophet.

    Sad..

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