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Zeus Attacks Jesus Statue

June 15, 2010

Solid Rock Church built a 62 foot high Jesus statue out of Styrofoam and fiberglass, and spent $250, 000 to construct and erect the statue. They called it the King of Kings statue but it became known as Touchdown Jesus.

The four thousand plus mega-church built the statue as a “sign of hope.” Homeless persons in the area were filled with hope… hope that there might be some money left over to feed and clothe them!

Of course there are things to be said theologically and ethically about an organization allocating those sort of resources to that sort of project, but perhaps more pressing at this point: who thought it would be a good idea to build a giant Jesus with two lighting rods pointed to the sky out of combustible materials?

Clearly the only logical conclusion at this point: Zeus is coming out of retirement. Obviously Zeus’ point is fairly clear with this attack; however, lightning strikes around the world need to be investigated to discern what his further message is! Remember: everything happens for a reason.

I just glanced at the picture again and I’m reminded of the scene in Forrest Gump when Lieutenant Dan rages against God and the sky during a storm. I mean, Jesus is looking at the sky asking for it!

Oh well, I guess Forrest summed up building a 62 foot combustible statue perfectly: stupid is as stupid does.

Solid Rock Church Jesus monument struck by lightning

MONROE — Charred remnants remained this morning, June 15, of the large Jesus statue iconic to Interstate 75 that was destroyed following an apparent lightning strike during a thunderstorm late Monday night.

Those at the scene this morning as the fog lifted around I-75 also described smoke damage to the Lawrence Bishop Music Theater located east of the statue. The theater also suffered fire damage, according to officials.

No firefighters were on scene this morning as the smell of smoke surrounded the area of the statue’s charred frame and the pond in front of it appeared murky, witnesses said.

No one was injured in the blaze and fire officials said they expect to have a damage estimate later this morning.

Read full story and see more pictures HERE

Here’s Jesus before he was healed. How good of a drummer would this Jesus be?

And here’s Jesus burning to the ground:

And finally, here’s Jesus after the makeover not inspiring quite as much hope!

Video: “Jesus is on fire. It’s amazing…”

HT: Phil’s Treehouse

Update: Best quote I have seen so far

Here’s the odd thing: they’re promising to rebuild it. You would think that it’s a rather unambiguous sign when your giant idol is smitten by a bolt of lightning from heaven, erupts into an all-consuming conflagration, and burns to the ground that maybe Jehovah is a little bit fed up. Yet the Solid Rock Church plans to offend God again.

I guess they don’t really believe.

13 Comments leave one →
  1. Headless Unicorn Guy permalink
    June 15, 2010 8:53 am

    Sure it was Zeus and not Thor?

  2. June 15, 2010 9:14 am

    Okay, this post made me budge from my lurk-potato feed-reader slouch to click in and thank you for the laugh.

    And while I’m at it, thanks for the good reads over the weeks I’ve subscribed. Enjoying your textual criticism series especially.

  3. June 15, 2010 9:17 am

    I’m guessing King of King’s colleague Touchdown Jesus down in South Bend is keeping a low profile this morning.

  4. Jon H permalink
    June 15, 2010 9:33 am

    The nearby “Hustler Hollywood” porn store, on the other side of I-75, was undamaged.

    Maybe it was Loki rather than Zeus.

  5. Jon H permalink
    June 15, 2010 9:37 am

    OT: You might find some exasperating amusement among the ‘papers’ submitted to

    Vixra is a preprint archive set up because Cornell’s arXiv has standards that won’t allow any loon to submit their rambling theories.

    You might start with:

    Summary of Recent Papers Written and Instructed by Authority that is Me, Jesus Christ
    Authors: Jesus Christ
    Comments: 3 Pages. Dictated by Jesus Christ to V. Christianto
    Summary of recent papers written and instructed by authority that is Me, Jesus Christ

  6. stephen permalink
    June 16, 2010 3:39 pm

    im christian and thats offensive lol just kidding im not offended but that is funny what a bunch of morrons forgive my spelling im sure it was just lightnig because when has zuez ever done anything. RAVEN

  7. July 1, 2010 5:23 am

    I live in OH about 15 or 20 miles from where the statue is, er I mean was…we called it Big Butter Jesus. And, yes it was nothing more than a huge lightning rod – many of us were surprised it hadn’t been struck earlier. I seriously doubt God took offense at it – I think this church meant well – and contrary to popular belief they do alot of relief work and help the poor – they even have built two orphanages – so they aren’t the “money grabbing” church people some claim. A little over the top, maybe, but we all do things differently don’t we? Ostentatious? Yeah, I think so – but many people liked it and it was inspirational to others so I’m not going to be the one to blast it — oh wait, that already happened. LOL Like ur blog – cheers.

  8. December 9, 2010 1:42 am

    None of these whiterace knows Jahovah Salvation because that where the name Jahshua is abbriviated , Christ,s name is Jahovahs Salvation, there is no need for further explanation, Jahovah is the timeless father of the twelve tribes and his Salvation will always come from the tribe of Judah, Jahovah created the world for his salvation, and his salvation is his word, his word is the bread of life the truth, the light the power and glory forever and ever hallelujah.
    The Kindom of heaven is tribal authority of the african tribes of the Queen of the South Queen Sheba, the Queen of the tribe of the twelve tribes of Jahovah from Monomatapa to Mesotopamia and the whole whole world.
    Zeus to Jesus is just a blind demonic delibarate mistranslation of our King of Kings and our high priest of all high priest, so that satan can also became the angel of light and decieve a lot Jews to aboundon their culture and tradition and become part of sun worship of sunday God of death from the fallen Babylon system of the fallen angels.
    Most black jews people think that they can outsmart the fallen angels without knowledge of the word of Jahovah, then they get outsmarted before they can try to think.
    one love to those who believe in Jesus of the twelve tribes and those who have found their tribe amoung te twelve tribes of Zion Regime.
    Christ is alive and well ask the night templers.

    • December 9, 2010 7:13 am

      at ‘no need for further explanation’… is where the crazy should have stopped.


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