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The Real Reason Why The Rapture Didn’t Happen

May 21, 2011

John Loftus posted his Predictions of the Excuses Harold Camping May Make. Joel Watts asked his readers to give their predictions as to how Camping will try to explain away his error, and Joel suggested a Post-Rapture Predictions Meme. Chris Tilling, like a phoenix from the ashes (or a minion from the depths of Sheol) posted two days in a row, and offered his own predictions of Camping’s future rapture-fail excuses.

Here’s what really happened: Macho Man Randy Savage, recently drafted to heaven, prevented the Rapture by delivering his patented flying elbow off of the gates of heaven to an unsuspecting Jesus. 1, 2, 3,… Prince of Peace is pinned and we have a new champion… and no Rapture.

Oooohhhhhh yeeeeaaahhhhhhh! Dig it!


21 Comments leave one →
  1. Samuel Boyle permalink
    May 21, 2011 5:14 pm

    Sort of offensive. I guess no one cares anymore though.

  2. May 21, 2011 5:46 pm

    Where did you get this from? Who is the original artist? Please post your sources! Also, this is awesome. Which is why I want to know where it’s from. 🙂

  3. Bane permalink
    May 22, 2011 10:56 am

    not at all offensive, religion stopped deserving to be exuded from scrutiny/questioning.

    If god is real the above actually happened, I take this document as the proof, tis all I need to BELIEVE!

  4. May 22, 2011 12:02 pm

    It is sort of offensive that anyone would think Macho Man would waste his time elbow dropping fictional characters. What’s next? Him figure four leg-locking Marduke?

    • May 22, 2011 12:50 pm

      Ty, have you ever read Enuma-Elish? Marduk is a bad-ass. Personally, if I found myself in Macho’s hypothetical afterlife position I would start with the dude who proclaimed non-violence and leave Marduk well enough alone!

      • May 22, 2011 11:42 pm

        At least he would be a challenge for the Macho Man. That’s a fight I’d pay to see.

  5. Ashley Markson permalink
    May 22, 2011 3:22 pm

    There’s a hilarious short film that addresses this “end of the world” neurosis, it’s called “Take Me 2012”:

  6. Kellison permalink
    May 22, 2011 3:43 pm

    This is disturbing, although the date was wrong, and the story was a little off….Jesus will come back some day. But we do not know when that day will be; but I don’t appreciate the humour in making Jesus look weak.

    • May 22, 2011 11:41 pm

      I think it’s hilarious.

    • VorJack permalink
      May 23, 2011 4:51 am

      Don’t worry, I’m sure there will be a rematch.

  7. May 22, 2011 3:49 pm


  8. Dave permalink
    May 22, 2011 8:55 pm

    Kellison, don’t you think the Son of Man is powerful enough to know when he is about to take a flying elbow to the back of the head by Savage? He doesn’t look the least bit phased. That’s not weak, that’s badass.

  9. Kelley permalink
    May 22, 2011 9:08 pm

    I want to know who made this too. I LOVE IT!

  10. May 23, 2011 3:12 am

    Maybe he meant it’s offensive to Randy Savage fans, in which case, I totally understand.


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