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Doorways to Demonic Possession

May 29, 2013

Everything’s coming up demons!


Via Joel “I Wish I Was Canadian” Watts, who admits he has allowed five demonic doorways into his life… kind of explains a lot really. (Click Image for Link)

You’ve got to love fear-mongering Christians–especially fear-mongering charismatic Christians: there is nothing so insignificant that the Devil or demons can’t use it to attack you.

Vegetarianism? Demons!

Yoga? Demons!

Video games? Demons!

Twilight films? Definitely demons!!!

One misstep and the demons will have a hold of you. Order a quarter-pounder instead of a Big Mac? Sorry bud, demons are now controlling your life!

But Lycanthropy and Vampirism? Let me give you a tip: if you “take part” in ‘lycanthropy’ you are not possessed by a demon but by insanity. If you think vampires are real, you are not possessed by a demon but a delusion. Go seek professional help.

How about “Skull & Bones”? The old Skull and Bones is somehow a doorway to demonic possession? Or do they mean don’t be a pirate, or do they mean don’t fly a pirate flag at your house or the demons can come in the front door?

Or do they mean… that my skull and bones are a DOORWAY TO DEMONS?!?!?



Now obviously, this sort of Christianity comes with a special sort of stupid, but I do still enjoy the Christian tactic of making some sort of value or truth statement and then justifying it with a biblical scriptural address.

[“Salt is bad for you” (Gen 19:26)– oh hey, I can do it too!]

Here are the verses noted above:

Eph 6:12: For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.

Deut 18:9-12: When you enter the land the Lord your God is giving you, do not learn to imitate the detestable ways of the nations there. Let no one be found among you who sacrifices their son or daughter in the fire, who practices divination or sorcery, interprets omens, engages in witchcraft, or casts spells, or who is a medium or spiritist or who consults the dead. Anyone who does these things is detestable to the Lord; because of these same detestable practices the Lord your God will drive out those nations before you.

That’s right, from the metaphysical speculation of ancient apocalypticism, and the retrojective law of Deuteronomy you shouldn’t do Yoga or demons will possess you.

The stupid, it burns.

P.S. – Don’t backmask!

6 Comments leave one →
  1. May 29, 2013 10:25 pm

    Lucky for them “lying” isn’t on the list.

    ‘How about “Skull & Bones”? The old Skull and Bones is somehow a doorway to demonic possession?’

    I know you’re just kidding around, but “Skull and Bones” is almost certainly a reference to the secret society at Yale University of which Bill Clinton and George Bush were members. Whoever came up with this list is a conspiracy theory aficionado as well as a Charismatic crank.

  2. nonya permalink
    August 14, 2013 1:51 pm

    You are the dumbest idiot I have ever had the displeasure of reading stupidity of. You really need to check your brain before calling others what you are and that is stupid.

  3. August 20, 2013 2:01 pm

    Hi. this is actually a page from our jack Chick parody tract we used to promote our online film Ivy League Exorcist: the Bobby Jindal Story. You can reas the whole tract at

  4. February 16, 2014 3:53 am

    yeah, i noticed that too. i’m pretty sure that he listened to every word that obama said. had his team there to help him answer questions quickly, or he knew all the questions before hand. he answered way to quick. the yes, yes, no. answer really annoyed me. he is a guy who would through his mother in front of a truck first and think later the out come.. anyway, thats the way i see john mccain. . i think he would make a good military person, but a lousy president. . so unless he is clairvoyant, he knew the questions before hand.


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